Am I Normal? – FHM Feature Article

As I went to put down the latest issue of Skin Deep magazine on my coffee table, I noticed the top ‘banner’ on an old FHM magazine – “Are you normal?“. I couldn’t remember reading it before, so I thought I may as well kill 5 minutes finding out whether I’m “normal”.

So, you wanna hear some stats? Well, here they are, along with my personal answers…

  • 33% of people lost their virginity after their 18th birthday.
    Me: 14/15 yrs old.

  • 76% of people think it is the same or harder being a man today than in the past.
    Me: Meh.

  • 48% of people change their bed sheets less than once a month.
    Me: Prior to having a live-in girlfriend – yes.

  • 40% of people masturbate once a day.
    Me: Whenever the mood takes me, sometimes not for a few days, sometimes a few times in a day.

  • 7% of men can’t remember if they’ve ever let anything inside their bum during intercourse.
    Me: Of course I can remember – yes. That statistic seems very low!

  • 22% of men don’t actually know if they’re in love.
    Me: Yep, I’m pretty sure I am.

  • 32% of men hate their job.
    Me: Nope, love it.

  • 40% of men drink more than 4 pints a week.
    Me: Waayyyyyy more than 4 pints!

  • 46% of people have slept with five, or less, people.
    Me: Just over 5 real people. If we’re counting hookers, then well over 5 people.

  • 80% of people trim their pubic region.
    Me: Yep, I try to as often as I can be arsed. I wanna be able to see my cock getting throated by my GF, not just her face bouncing on a load of bush.

In addition to these handy figures, which do nothing to reassure me, I must be honest, we also get a couple of little feature write ups to reassure us that it is not possible to wank too much and that the average penis size is 5.16″ erect and 3.6″ flaccid.

I must admit – those last two put my mind at ease, and gave me a little confidence boost, respectively 😙

Anyways, just thought I’d share this with you all, as I should be working, but am instead flicking through old bottom shelf wank mags.